Grief

As I have walked this journey of moving beyond the diagnosis there are times grief comes up.  

When that happens I sometimes focus on what I have lost:

Consistency in my days, the ones that pain keeps me from doing what I want to.

Movement without thinking. Especially the days that I have nerve pain and I cannot feel my feet.

A body I can trust to do what I want or need it to do on days I fall. 

On days my brain isn’t a jerk I focus on what I have gained.

Things like:

Learning to listen to my body and what it needs in the moment.

Gratitude for movement from place to place without a fall. 

An excellent team of medical providers, fellow travelers, coaches and mentors who help me see all I can still do. 

Most of all the  community I have found who love me unconditionally even on the days I am not my best self.

On the days that grief says hello, I am learning to think about how my diagnosis has been a blessing.

Let me know the ways grief has been a blessing to you.

"You cannot prevent the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from building nests in your hair." ~Old Chinese proverb